just stared at ed norton's ass for 26 miles. if there was ever an incentive to run a marathon, that was it. my life is perfect.
he put a lighter in my cleavage and said "you're like another pocket!"
Does your gf have any friends she can hook me up with?
Better looking than her though please.
Yes, that was me on the jumbo tron. No, i don't know why i was hiding.
well what is some mechanical horse racing with out blow involved
yo your bro wants to know what time he got home and were you hosing him off
I want to take my head off and cuddle with it
Maybe it will forgive me and stop being an asshole
I found a half-finished mass text from my California weekend that said "things I want to rape: you, things, stuff, and le"
Please stop using me as a reference for bail bondsmen.
Yea not today, I ending up taking a shit behind a tree last night.
He sent a video of him jacking off....class will be awkward tomorrow
I don't want anything calamari shaped after last night. But I appreciate the Cheerios offer.
Pregnancy has ruined porn for me. I can't watch a hot chick get it on without being jealous of her perfectly waxed shit. I can't even see my shit.
Can't tell if it's the drugs or science magic, but I *THINK* that mouse just turned into a squirrel.
I woke up and finished the bottle like a champ
Randomize
