I have to decide between the hot young blond with no apparent gag reflex, and the brunette with a great ass and a trust fund.
Stop everything. They have oreo straws to drink milk with and then you eat the straw. I think i just got turned on by a cookie commercial.
just to let you know coffee and vodka was a bad way to start the day
I gave the naked guy in the hotel hall a pop tart. He stopped crying.
Its that time of week again, Bad life decision wednesday
this is probably the only time in my life that i would want to fuck thomas jefferson
considering how much of last night I don't remember and the amount of ones laying on my desk right now, it's safe to say I'm concerned
I think I'm coming down now. I almost started crying because I lost a piece of paper.
Like. I probably should fuck him. I owe him for breaking his thumb.
The pastor just stopped the sermon to lay hands on me. THAT hungover.
I woke up with what appeared to be LSD in my pocket. Know anything about this?
We were fucking and his phone rang and it was his grandma. He just had a conversation with his grandma while fucking me from behind. Then his dad called and asked him what he wanted from taco bell.
Haha, how do I word that nicely? "You got me to the edge of no return twice and failed to let me orgasm, therefore you owe me chicken nuggets or hot wings. Your decision"
Sounds like either a very good Friday night or a very bad Saturday morning.
In the event that Ian's ex wife asks you, tell her I'm sweet snd innocent. No reason.
Randomize
