What would a frattoo be? Maybe like the Chinese symbol for Keystone Light.
so i'm sitting in his room drinking tequila from the bottle and watching harry potter. he's jacking off to some porn a couple feet away from me. at one point i look over and see that he's watching me instead of the porn. please help me figure out how warped it is that i found that romantic
just because you are in college doesnt mean its okay to pregame easter mass.
shes perfect for him. shes never seen a penis so she has nothing to compare his to.
At the end of the night you handed the bartender a piece of paper with the word "VISA" written on it.
She had forties taped to her hands and was trying to give him a hand job while he was passed out, with everyone in the living room.
I really need to create fewer "the time I was on drugs" stories for my future memoir, "my first year in San Francisco".
good luck with that
the last thing I heard was you screaming as the rodeo team herded you to the next party
Tell me about it. Running across highways take alot outta ya. When he found out, he was all "concerned" about it.
blew off easter dinner with the fam to go play shot roulette. woke up in nothing but my boxers in the back of a random pickup truck.
It all went downhill when I figured out I could launch myself into people with my crutches
I walked a mile in this weather wearing nothing but a toga. Zero fucks. Your move Mother Nature.
They said you went back in for 30 minutes and were walking with your arms out like an eagle soaring
quickly learned not to sleep with your roommate and work colleague in the same week
Thanks to you I just drunkenly spot washed a Star Wars hoodie, at midnight on a Friday. If there is a greater level of nerdiness I do not know of its existence
Randomize
