forecast for tonight- shitshow with a chance of tbell
my version of bright and sunny.
Um....I woke up to a lipgloss covered bottle of Jack daniels in my arms..
You've kissed worse.
Riddle me this. What had unbelievable sex, and finally understands the meaning that things come better in pairs?
I hate you
i really wish someone from a royal background would fuck me so i could literally say i was 'royally fucked'.
Haha. We better find him. He looked like he came out of Switzerland's vagina, he's that much of a blonde beauty.
When I realized it was a dog, and I still had a boner, it was awkward.
The bartender cut me off so I peed in the corner. How no one noticed I have no idea.
I want to wear something that says I'm a lady (but I have condoms!)
They have chocolate covered tequila candy at work. This is not a drill. May be drunk by noon.
I meant to thank you again for giving up a potential interracial threesome to come to my party. I'm glad you stayed!
Well the streets were closed, so it was okay for me to just lay down for a little bit.
Last night I went to spank her while she was riding me and sack-tapped myself.
If I ever see that bitch it is going down flavor of love style
I need to sanitize my soul.
he bought me ice cream then took me home and fucked the shit outta me. you can't write this kinda romance.
Randomize
