we should go somewhere reaaaaaal shady
he put his p in my v, then his p in my a, and then tried to put the p in my m? first, double dipping is rude. second, i'm glad he finished shortly after that, i'm afraid of where he'd try to stick it next. my ear?
Condoms? Check. Glitter? Check. Fuck me pumps? Double check. Dignity? No where to be found. I'm about to homewreck the shit out of that dumb bitch.
I've been meaning to talk to you about your lack of self-respect these days and the toll it's taking on your vagina.
Woke up wearing just a scarf, the holidays are definetly here
i feel as if its time to shave my pubes but i should wait until before the party. nobody likes a sloppy drunk girl with a stubble-crotch.
story of my life.
Hold on there are flying pancakes I can't handle this right now
81 degrees in april.... Thinking margaritacicles, you in?
I am stoned and listening to the Olympics music I downloaded on Saturday. Best 6 dollars I have ever spent.
my dad is now demonstrating how to start a fire with a tampon. happy fucking new year!
Stocking up on Wasabi powder. Nobody's tampons are safe.
Beer and xanax may be a bad combo, but I don't really care due to the beer and the xanax.
I bet you there is porn for people who get off on someone rubbing Chipotle on themselves
HE LIVES IN ANOTHER STATE
actually scratch that last text, he's the perfect boyfriend. He stays faithful and doesnt find out about all the guys here. it's a win-win
She ripped her shorts off and yelled "VAGINA TIME!"
Being high is definitely not the perfect addition to this family dinner. No. My grandma trips me the fuck out.
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