Last night while we were having sex, 'God bless the USA' started playing on his itunes. He came almost immediately... so awkward.
Will you Wikipedia Vin Diesel? Is he gay? It's important...
You wouldn't stop crying and screaming Hilary Duff doesn't deserve Gossip Girl
you kept saying 'its nothing a six pack wont fix' as they loaded you into the ambulance.
What's the big deal? you guys fuck
3 times is my limit. I don't even want to know you exist after 3 times
There's gotta be a lawn gnome full ecstasy around here somewhere. And by golly I will find it
The spark has left our relationship. i used to make slightly inflammatory jokes at you. you would retaliate in jest. look at this. look at what is happening here.
Wait also totally unrelated but can horses sit down?
I just tried to picture one and I don't think they can cause I can't envision it
So hungover. I dropped my keys and leaning over seemed a terrible idea. Instead I took my shoe off in the middle of the street and use my toes to pick them up. Think I'm a genius.
Getting your clit pierced is not something you want to trust to a crazy girl with an ice cube, some vodka, and a sewing needle. Trust me. I learned that the hard way.
I'm not gonna lie. I'm a little scared.
Good. The Jell-O shots look great.
It's not above me to sleep with him solely for his authentic budweiser shirt
we got cupcakes after we fucked. gives a whole new meaning to sugar daddy
just because i'm not a monk anymore doesn't mean I need to tell you about my new sex life.
which is fantastic by the way.
On a scale of one to 10 how Risky is it to sleep with a married man (all morals set aside)
Randomize
