nailed a girl as she was wearing a darth vader shirt. Cross that one off my list.
Mom's drinking. Just asked her if she was good to walk back to the condo. She seemed unsure until she remembered she brought the GPS. We are 2 blocks from the condo.
My choices this week make me realize that I need to copyright the term "cock buffet"
it was a 10 min screaming orgasm. i don't care that you were next door and didn't appreciate all the noise.
I wouldn't take my shot so you poured it on my face. Twice.
Housekeeping just called to see if we were okay bc they came in the room earlier and we didn't move.
I officially became the girl who let a guy get her off under the covers last night while her roommate and a friend were there. He was impressed by my ability to stay quiet and stay relatively focused on the conversation...
I am so ashamed of you, and yet so proud.
I'm sitting outside your room listening for sex noises eating pepperoni...slowly
If I had a vagina, my apartment would have been the Atlantic
Just bought a colored water bottle so my classmates can be so judgemental when I bring beer to class.
I just really wish I could go back and unsex him. Waste of my vagina.
Knowing that porn stars want to fall in love is the weirdest thing I've found to be beautiful recently. I'm so lonely.
Is it a problem if I'm trying to condition Goodbye Horses to trigger an erection?
Hey.. Lock your door. There's a drunk girl walking around in here. She just came in my room and peed on my chair.
I. Love. Skype. Sex.
I think it's just been too long since actual dick has been inside you that you only THINK you love skype sex
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