im stripping for him via video chat, but the sound is turned off cause his students are taking a test
Too long to explain. Basically I started an electircal fire. No one was hurt except for a box of cereal near the outlet.
I'm pretty sure he's lost all respect for me. it probably happened somewhere around the time i had officially slept with every single one of his friends..
I'm going to look like a jackass in the Mexican newspaper tomorrow.
Im deleting that text because its a possible ncaa violation
we were hooking up and then he goes "you can touch my penis" and i laughed too hard to do anything. no second date.
And to add, there was a fat guy right next to me who, when the girls would shake their butts, he would let out a shrill xena warrior princess cheer
I'm officially no longer allowed to make any of my own decisions regarding alcohol, men, or the combination of both. Thats up to you now. Do me proud.
What's sexier than showing up smelling like fast food cigarettes with a jar of moonshine in your hand
I may be going to Mexico. I just met a drug dealer at a strip club. Seems legit.
So my class is approximately two vomits from the bus stop. Happy first day of class
I encourage you to ignore feeling. Drinking more helps
I'm putting his belongings the garage sale so he can buy his own stuff back. # divorced life. Thanks for cheating on me you tone deaf dick biscuit that'll be $20. Haha.
I spend so much of my life shaving my body hair off and I want nothing more than his beard in all my hairless places.
Listen, I just paid for a hotel room, so I didn't have to have sex in his car. I'm adulting successfully.
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