all thats left of you is your magnum wrapper on my dresser
took out my tampon, fucked him, and put a new one back in all before he realized I was on my period. beat that one bitch.
just found my diary from when i was 14. i demand a drinking game of this.
theres a kid in a leopard robe and sunglasses filling up a gas tank. i miss college
ive cried into many a lonely burritos..
She told me she's dating him because his apartment is a block from Taco Bell. I don't know how she's not fat.
She jumped on a table and took off her shirt and started yelling things that no one understood. For being 3, she has a dead on impression of a drunk party girl.
You get 5 min
Your time limits don't scare me, I'll include foreplay and redressing in that 5 min. If you wanted to challenge me you should say you got an hour, id be scared then and more creative.
Yeah then you killed that bottle of Bacardi in under 20 minutes. So much for being an organ donor.
He bedazzled a shirt for me that said "best head giver" should I be thankful for the gift or concerned that he has a bedazzler?
Anne is dead. totally passed out and was flat out in the street
You're a FUCKING ASSHOLE. Love mom
Broken heels while double fisting margaritas, picking up shirtless, bloody men and escorting them out of harms way, the meltdown when I realized I can go without a bra bc my boobs shrunk, the morning vodka red bull you were forced to drink? Which one roped you in?
Omg, new summer goal: sex in a bouncy castle.
If I don’t find a quality dick soon I’m going to beg the neighbor for another threesome with her and her husband. It’s like Covid killed all the quality penis Vegas normally has
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