Tell him ill love him long time
I'll assure him of it
I don't think ill make it tonight the floor wont let me walk
I didn't realize how hung over I was until I rolled over and the world rolled over with me.
On this egg donor form, it asks "In the past 5 years, have you had sex for drugs or money?" It only gives a yes or no option and no place to explain myself. What do I do?
She looks makes a Zellweger face when she cums, she's keeps asking why I call her renee
I know I am usually the slut but tonight it's her. She is being a slut, yes slut, T as in Tomorrow, U as in Uterus, L as in Llama and S as in Sangria. That spells slut, but backwards and that's what she is being.
you kind of just crawled on top of him. that was the point at which i became concerned with how drunk you were.
At the bar. Madeline and I totally brought our own pitcher from home because they always run out. Hello alcoholism.
I'll come out for a little. I can't be visibly hungover at work again or I get written up and fired. And yes, I am aware of how alcoholic that sounds.
i had a threesome. one of the guys used to bully me in high school too for being gay.
Gym?
Sweet baby Jebus, no. I'm Motley Crue hungover. This must be how it feels to rail a line of ants.
I told her I was going to sleep early last night. I probably should not have sent that snapchat of us playing beer pong.
When confronted with a choice of going home or fucking the band ALWAYS FUCK THE BAND!!
who knew tequila and Christmas cookies would go so well together
you got into a really intense arguement about protecting bees. it was wierdly arousing.
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