He seemed more like the type to get donkey punched by a she-male hooker to me
Cuntadactyl. (n). A pre-historic dinosaur of Mandy-like features that is primarily identified by it's inability to play well with others and overall C-word demeanor. Physically, an unfortunate appearance.
Like if I don't roll around in my puke, the night will be a failure.
i know and i thought i was only capable of loving dick and drugs, im so happy
Dude they have your information. Come back. The sheriffs office is here, they are pissed..please come back otherwise jail is inevitable. Call me
its so hard to text. the buttons are tickling my fingers
I've woken up in some weird places in my lifetime, but never in a tent in my own garage.
just remembered spooning on the cardboard and confessing to each other we had the spins.
The only responsible thing ive done in vegas is shower and that was onky to clean vomit off me
Just ate tuna on a frozen waffle because we were out of bread.
This is why you don't have nice things.
I feel like as your wife, as cool with your decision-making skills as I usually am, there should be a bigger explanation to you adopting a child while I'm in Houston.
I just flicked a lizard out of the window with a bud light in one hand and spatula inthe other...dont tell me you dont miss the south
SEX BINGO!
Canadian or clown?
Yeah I mean subtle isn't how I'd describe your flirtation strategy last night
This girls ass literally just fell out of her jeans in front on me on the escalator. Going commando on a Monday morning is a bold move.
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