Haym$ered
turn off your phone and go to bed
"Reality" and all separate lives are the same thing?... We all have separate realities?! My life Has one reality and yours has another?
Haha how much did you smoke
4 feet of smokeee!
once we finished he held up the condom and asked if i wanted to keep it as a souvenir.
oh and he was serious.
A freshman just woke up on our back pourch... He swears there was a party here last night but we didn't have one
I think the fact that my first kiss is now in a porno says a lot about why my life is the way it is
there may or may not be knives in your bed. I would check
Why can't public transit accommodate my lifestyle of drinking til midnight on a Monday?
The more and more I drink I keep rationalizing banging eye patch girl
Some guy just ordered at Cosmo and 2 screwdrivers in the sky club at 8:30 am. I'm starting to feel a lot better about my alcoholism
Just cried to my husband about how much I'm going to miss my boyfriend... Maybe marriage is going to work for me after all
I'm terrified that I'm going to have a baby with a guy who posts snapchat stories while ignoring my texts
SO EXCITED ABOUT STRING CHEESE RIGHT NOW
Used my brand new sperrys as a trash can to throw up in and woke up with someone's random key in my hair...new year new me:)
I can't hookup with a guy in my car because it smells like Taco Bell..
THAT'S NOT NICE
NEITHER WAS PROMISING NOT TO TAKE MY SISTER'S VIRGINITY, THEN PROMPTLY DOING SO
Randomize
