What would a frattoo be? Maybe like the Chinese symbol for Keystone Light.
Just found my girlfriend's stash of animated Japanese porn
And to think, I actually considered breaking up with her
i love that he's uncircumcised. it makes handjobs so much easier. it's the lazy susan of penises.
He just told an 8 year old to go fuck himself so we probably won't be in the butterfly exhibit much longer.
Um yeah. I just puked. And found your contact.
I'm ordering a French maid costume for my dog too. It's like a couples costume, except for losers with dogs.
FACE TIME HER WHILE YOU GUYS BANG
You sent me a naked picture of you as a child? How is that normal
My FitBit tracked the calories I burned during sex. Hello 2015!
Monday afternoon and I'm still hungover from Valentine's Day. I think I'm winning at the single life.
I expect you will be there for a drunken 3way with my husband again this new year.
He seemed genuinely disappointed when I told him I wasn't going to make out with him to Bring Me To Life by Evanescence so I feel like I've pinpointed the breaking point of this relationship
Also, we can't be seen together looking suspicious or sexually satisfied
I just remembered that I insisted everyone watch porn together last night.
I woke up an hour ago with orange fingers and a condom stuck to my head.. Wtf just happened?
Randomize
