you're drinking in the law library????
...not a bad idea....
probably not a good idea either.
Tittie bar + Mother In law gone = mission accomplished.
He asked me to sit on his face, but i didnt, for 2 reasons, one, i had just pooped like 20 mins before sex, and two, this could be my future husband. so i skipped on sitting.
the people going to church this morning while i was walking home did not seem as pleased as i was with how many beads i earned last night
She looked like a pterodactyl.....but dude i love dinosaurs
Don't you ever say "drinking at 2" as if it's a bad thing again. I'm asking you as a friend here.
he said that weed should be legal but that particular bong shouldn't be. i stared at a clock for an hour and a half after i ripped. so logically, i completely agree.
Any day you don't mysteriously wake up in the garbage is a good day.
i think the beer goggles wore off after hearing the story of her 2nd abortion
I've never felt so inclined to grow a dick. THIS is what the gays in this town have done to me
The Medal of Honor you banged could be at the inauguration today. You really dropped the ball on keeping up with that one.
People don't tend to fuck with you when they think you have someone else's blood on your face
I made him fuck me with my coat zipped up and a unicorn mask on. That level of drunk sex. Weird and creepy yet highly satisfying.
Any chance the bar is open now? Also who's wedding is this?
I'm getting paid to get fucked up. How much better could this get?
Randomize
