I cant wait to get the disapproving look from this elderly black lady...
Can I ask u a weird question?
Sure
do u have the hershy squirts too?
Where??
Against the wall. In corner. Only gave him head though don't worry
please tell me that the half empty jar of cocktail sauce on the table has nothing to do with my missing seamonkeys
If I had known I was gonna take my tights off and throw them over the balcony I would have shaved my legs.
I just heard someone say "gosh-darnit" and they didn't have a southern twang. I worry for New York.
And to think..we used to do everything sober...
sorry about having a shotput competition with your microwave, seemed like a good idea at the time
So not only did you shoot down my invitation and prob walked past my house but now ur excluding me from a wet t shirt contest which btw i totally would have won
Wtf just happened. Thought you were in my bed since 3am, turned out I was sharing it w/a drunk girl from the 6th floor lounge...
You were sitting in the tub, clothed, squirting my KY all over yourself. You said "it's warm." then passed out.
I'm seeing double so when I get home can we have a threesome?
I just googled: how soon can I pee on a stick. What is my life coming to.
Her boyfriend offered to buy me a vibrator. I'm not sure how to feel about that.
Also, next time I go get a wax, I'm gonna ask the girl about the innie to outie ratio she sees on the daily.
Randomize
