so he let me use one of the toothbrushes that came in his daughters 4 pack, purple glittery toddler toothbrush, the next time i came back his wife has used their label maker and put my name on it...
i have received so many congratulations texts this morning. sleeping with him really was a good decision.
We ran out of toilet paper the last week, so we just took showers to pee
I'm currently blowing up the downstairs bathroom at work. I wish I could foursquare this.
She is chewing on staples and spitting them at her cat, I think it's time to leave..
I don't think he realizes it but he was stroking the faucet while he was talking to me.
In the middle of getting a blow job, she looked up at me and said "this isn't the first time I've done this today"
she drove 3 hrs one way just to sleep with me. I felt bad complaining about paying for condoms.
I swallowed for you. Answer the phone.
I told you he wasn't attractive.
Do you think I cared? I was wiping myself with a scarf..
I need Mexican food. Like, I'd take it through a needle at this point. It's totally worth the track marks.
Is it OK to disqualify a potential therapist if she lists 50 Shades of Gray as her favorite book? Or is that a good thing?
He told me I was a good dog mom. I've never been so turned on in my life
What is it in my brain that makes me look at a penis and think "that belongs in my mouth"?
Oh BTW the next time I see you I don't care where we are your dick will be going into some part of my body.
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