Already tried, she's too smart for that. I need a Primos "Do your wife in the butt" lure/call to trick her into wanting it
thats the mark of a good guy. when you can period all over his leg and he still thinks you're beautiful!
A guy on the street just growled at me and said damnnnn. Sometimes it scares me how attractive i am.
He said he's gonna start calling me "Benny" because we're "friends with bennyfits"
through my window right now you can see the hot chick next door is standing BUTT ASS NAKED eating peanut butter off a knife.
ill be there in 5.
He couldn't say anything coherently but shot off a perfectly timed "that's what she said" when michelle said he'd have to ride in the trunk because she didn't have enough room up front.
Dude its 315 and I'm sitting here eating slices of cheese. Don't talk to me about tomorrow.
was it good sex?
i mean it was good for how drunk we were. and for how big the closet was
I'm trying to spell out I love you with a series of photos of my penis, but I just realized I can't do the Y of you
I just bid on a $9000 car because I think its my ex-girlfriends. Yes I wanna hit that again.
I command you to take a shot and dance like the pretty little gay boy you are.
I just puked behind a tree outside work, then walked past my manager with puke in my hair. Man, I'm gonna miss this when I get a real job.
Why exactly is there a butt plug on the counter?
I cant believe you bit her ass cheek, she must have been really weirded out.
yeah so we made out to make it less awkward
Was just at a stoplight and some kid was smoking a blunt and we smiled at him and he offered to pass it between cars... Only in Rockford
Randomize
