So today I found out that our school is known as the herpes school
Had sex with the ex last night. Regretting to begin in 5, 4, 3, 2, 1... WHYYYYYYYYYY!
I feel like I am becoming dumber sitting here in class than I would be sitting on the couch smoking weed.
Plus she can make a mean sandwich! That's all I really need. Well that and foot jobs...
Intervention is following me on twitter.
wow.
The world would have a new energy source if someone would just take a blacklight to the backseat of that slut's car
Im sweating champagne and woke up in nothing but a tuxedo jacket. What didnt go wrong last night?
I just want to know who nailed the chicken nugget to the door.
I dont know about you but I'm not getting out of bed this summer for anything but food or sex
OH. MY. GOD. FUCK HIM. JUST GRAB HIM AND FUCK HIM.
well they never fully had sex so she's like an eskimo step-sister. I'll make a family tree for you.
Why is there puke in my guitar?
Because you puked in your guitar.
I love when groups of boys part so I can walk through. It's like a red sea of penises, and I am their Moses.
What did we do lastnight that resulted in a $1,896 charge on my credit card with a $2,000 limit
if my 20s were a chapter in my autobiography, it would be called "the room is spinning and my hands smell like dick"
Randomize
