so im watching realhousewives of jersey with my mom. she just said they werent really rich bc they were doing their own makeup.
well look at the bright side
maybe you can be on an episode of "I Didn't Know I Was Pregnant"
Why did you video tape me drying my boxers in the microwave?
I'm walking down the halls of our hotel and listening for sex noises and knocking when I do.
There's a show on the Discovery Channel about T-Rex sex. I think this just made my life.
i thought i'd fucked her to death. no lie. she just stopped moving.
I can't even remember the last time I took my own pants off
Ok- my dad's ex-wife's Irish nephew. Weird if we fuck or not?
he just kept repeating "those were some pretty nipple-y tits" over and over the rest of the night
He should just accept that I want his dick and his friendship. Can't he understand that I don't do emotions?
He licked my mouth. I felt like I was making out with my dog.
Did I really just send a work email with cum instead of come? feck me
Hey, you should go to your facebook ASAP... i'm guessing you're wasted but you just uploaded a picture of someones dick...and everyones taking bets now if its Rick or Mikes..
I added our drug dealer to the quickbooks software babe, he is listed under vendor's as an expense category... money management is such a bitch...
I’ve got a lot of questions but the first one has to be where you got the flame thrower.
Randomize
