at church Sunday morning I dropped an M&M down my dress and it landed in my bra. I fished it out and ate it. A lot of people saw me.
One thing i hate about playoff baseball: George Lopez
Why does Corona taste like a burp?
You "were" hungover, which is past tense. So that gives you no excuse not to go out tonight.
Upside of a two-day migraine: thanks to a prominent "E" in the middle of every pill, I think we can totally pass off Excedrine Migraine as ecstasy to stupid, drunk freshman. This is totally going to happen. That entrepreneurship course is paying off.
marshmallow pipe was a success. so was melon pipe. come try it
I only feel half bad for cheating on him because while we were fucking I was given great relationship advice and now I'm ready to work some things out.
FYI...Jose likes Shamrock shakes better than Jack
I need to have some sort of hot sex experience in a mask.
Hey start looking around for a low rider Subaru. Well get a loan. It will be capital for our first music video.
Hooked up to multiple episodes of Even Stevens last night. What the fuck.
you can only text me tonight if its in drake lyrics. thats the rule
Ims textiofg thsi woht my noes bcuz my hansd aer stli handcuffde to teh bedfrme. Help me
One more sleep until playoffs, Canucks are back this year, you bet your ass I'm going to uphold the tradition of being the 90 lb girl that fights every hairy ass Bruins fan at BWW.
Why don’t they have healthy alcohol yet?
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