Yea and his cousin visited from central and i fucked her i was texting him at work teasin him about it but sent it to his mom by accident
I think that i just found proof that harry and ginny had sex
How far into the semester do we have to be before it's ok to get drunk in between classes again?
Just because your phone has a case on it doesn't mean it will survive a 5 story drop out the window.
You convinced me that eggnog and rum is a great moisturizer.
I left two hundred in singles in your car sorry about the mess
Saw a guy throw up on himself while walking, drinking, and singing all at the same time. Hope your night is going better than his :)
Hello and welcome to the game 'Matt needs weed'! Rules are simple: first one to find a bag wins the fabulous prize of getting stoned with yours truly. Thank you for playing and good luck!!
I'm on this new diet called "I have 10$ till next Friday, I have rice
I'm not sure what step "make amends" is, but my phone is on
Ok let me just clear up this blowjob thing first so we can talk about your grandpa
Just made a bong out of a pineapple. So yes.. And champagne is about to be popped
How does a face ride mean we're back together?
I'm sorry, that really sucks. I'm in the bath eating lasagna and if anyone comes in here it's going to be bad news for them
I knew I wanted to marry her when we got in that bar fight and she full-nelsoned a guy while I worked his kidneys. I knew then we had to breed
Randomize
