all I know is if I don't watch spice world right now there will be a firefight.
My grandmother just explained bulimia to me as a diet
Dipping chips in queso and thinking of your beautiful face
I'm so used to throwing up its no longer a game of hanging over the toilet. Now it's just 'stand up, aim for the toilet, do my thing' then walk out
I want to start this convo out by apologizing for the broken toaster.
oh dear god, that would be like watching to female walruses mate. We need to stop going to that lesbian bar...
Dude, you chugged an entire bottle of tomato sauce and got us free drinks for the night. No way was I gonna stop you.
When exactly does a bender just become a lifestyle?
She busted her face in a tragic twerking accident. Marking the 2nd time I have peed my pants laughing.
She yelled "taste the gay rainbow" in a biker bar. She's either brave or fuckin stupid.
The German just referred to my vagina as the Great Barrier Reef and that he was going to go diving in it.
My poor liver. I drank enough on NYE to sustain an alcohol addiction for the entirety of 2015.
THIS THING HATES MY LIVER
How does it feel to date your dad?
Can now check off "Start bar fight with my dad." on my bucket list.
Randomize