it cannot be done, he is unbreakable.
What?
..he cannot be seduced..she had to have roofied him.
Details.
In the future we'll all be gay
We walk out of his house and his dad is there, so I had to meet him and shake his hand pretending that same hand hadn't been down his son's pants five minutes earlier
Situation: He got it in my eye, how long do I let it sting before should start to worry?
He walked into my room in the middle of the night, whispered something about the patriot act, and took my tv.
I am ina trunk. Iam in a trunnnnnjkk. I hope its yours. Oh manomanomano. Thids better be your trunk
Which one of you fuckers thought itd be funny to see if the kitchen table can float.
you owe me at least a beer for the services my girlfriend just provided for you
You know you need to take better care of yourself when shaving reminds you of sheep shearing...
I shaved last nite, you should see my cock it looks like a beautiful skyscraper
Oh man I wish I could've gotten a picture of how many anti-circumcision stickers are on this Prius
Just found a rebirth in peppermint schnapps. May be able to stay up all night and finish this paper after all. MERRY CHRISTMAS
You kept singing "your gonna lose that girl" to him right in front of her.. of course you got punched in the face.
Been smoking since 4. The inevitable finally happened: I bought a cheesecake.
He flipped a shopping cart in the back room and had to leave to make a jazz playlist. If we aren't in love then i don't know what love is.
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