Can you tell me we didn't drink from a fish bowl we found in the bathroom last night? I know it would be a lie; I just need to hear it.
If I remember taking any of my finals after tomorrow night, it will not have been a successful night.
Just got off the phone with poison control. They're more concerned about our alcohol intake than that the beer bong was last cleaned with pine sol.
you humped every kiosk in the store. then you asked for an application.
We just made a drinking game out of our chemistry review. This might explain my chemistry grade.
He just sent me a picture of me icing a cake with a butcher knife topless.
thanks for paying me in special brownies...but brownies dont pay the rent...anymore.
I kindof just wanted to go downstairs and let his dad know how good his son was at sex
Guess which frat house I just walked out of! And on a related note... guess who's uncircumsized
I found him in his pink and white boxer out side the dorm hall and the only thing he said was "it wouldn't let me in"
I am coping with the snow storm with beer and shots of jack. If I were outside in shorts I might be able to pass as a Canadian.
she pretty much pinned my hand to her boob "on accident" for like 10 seconds before she moved. Waiting the rest of the night was just a formality.
What's the procedure for answering a booty call from someone under house arrest?
Pretty sure i brought my phone charger to a booty call
This love triangle bullshit is getting out of hand. It's now a love polygon and I want out
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