I was totally willing to let her keep giving me blowjobs as long as she didn't think we were in a relationship.
so stoned i ashed in my jack and coke like 4 times. drinking it anyway
why is allison so mad at me??
me and her walked into dans and you yelled "hello my dear alli, you're looking mighty overweight today!".
crap..
I feel like after all he sees, the dog needs to get baptized.
She told me she eats fruit when she's hungover because it has more water than water.
He tried to cuddle with me after we hooked up and i just looked at him and said why are you still here?
Just smoked pot with a guy who has apparently been living in the woods for over a month. He just walked out of the woods. This is not real life.
Why is it that every study session with you turns into a hunt for drugs?
we found him passed out on the baseball field with two 40oz and wearing a tophat.
Where did he get the tophat?
it's pretty awkward texting you how much I want to suck your cock when I have my mom on speakerphone.
On my way
can I cover your dick in cookie butter?
He seduced me by making me nachos. It worked.
Have you ever been so high that you felt like corduroy? I'm at that level.
Her blow jobs are legen wait for it seriously like 9 people I know brag about them dary
Did you really eat 10 ice cream cones today?
It was tough but I powered through it.
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