Ooooh. That's not a mole. Uncomfortable.
Yeh xou jao i ama wa7tdud !!
Oh my god. its not even twelve thirty and you are useless.
I have show me your genitals stuck in my head. Except in spanish. Muestrame tus genitals. Tus genitals.
Are you for fucking real.? He divorced me just because he got a fucking girlfriend.?!
you made sure to tell everyone that the amount of people you had slept with was actually quite low, especially when the size of your breasts was taken into account
Ps I don't think it counts as being open minded if you didn't know he was missing a leg until you had already started making out.
It was huge And he was twirling it around. Im telling you, beautiful wonderpenis
The highlight of your blackout was when you drunk showered with the garden hose and emailed your boss your vacation requests for the next year.
Definitely just found that pen in the microwave. What the fuck.
Me, him and the recently stolen carpet walked down the road and into the strip club. We had to check the carpet with our coats, it didn't mind missing out too much, later the door guy at Subway held carpet during late night sandwich selection.
I woke up with a stapler in my ass. Don't even complain to me.
How long can I keep it classy to hook up in my old office building? Two more years? Does it get weird after 30?
No other awkward car ride can beat the one you give your drug dealer home.
I had the choice between 9 burritos and 1 girl...
And...?
He is married, and has a regrettably large penis. I need to find another one right away to get myself out of this mess.
How big does a penis have to be before it becomes regrettably so?
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