Laziness has reached now heights if you too unmotivated to buy pot
the doormen always congratulate him in spanish as he walks me downstairs in the morning
Passed out on a playground for a while before trying to break into the elementary school. Erica thought her captain tasted like cat food, so she poured her bottle into her cat's dish and proceeded to eat it like cereal.
You win. Erica always eats cat food.
I love the progression of these pictures. I go from cute to Courtney Love
He went soft
Wait. During?
Yeah, he was IN. MY. MOUTH.
cell reception changed and I can no longer text you from the toilet... that means I'll be texting you less often, just fyi
We had sex in front of Notre Dame Cathedral, but I lost my wallet. God giveth and God taketh away.
im pretty sure this vending machine only exists when im drunk
She sat on the stairs and yelled sex positions at us. I don't remember if we went along with it but judging by the beer and condoms I'm thinking yes.
Happiness is watching your asshole boss' police DUI video.
Pretty sure the shower sex fucked up my hip alignment... im walking like im 104 today
her wearing orange crocs at the bar was definitely a great form of contraception
I threw a dessert topping at a baby tonight so drink up! If you stay sober tonight I will be very disappointed in you.
does anyone know where bryan is?
last i saw he was naked, and crying in the bathroom because there was no more booze.
My fuck it list is complete! I finally got a firefighter!
Randomize
