remember the good old days of high school when a half gal would last for more than a nite
Getting high on the stoop of a brownstone in the middle oh harlem. Doesn't get much more hey arnold than this.
ASIANS HAVE SEX TOO!! I just watched it happen in the library.
When are you not under some influence?
Since last Tuesday...yesterday.
The bartender just hugged us goodnight. I think we go there too often.
i feel like there is just so much pressure to sex him up, its like the weight of the world is on my vagina.
I'm in the freezer. Shit took away any trace of hangover outa my body.
just found out that she named her cat after me.
I respect your roll as DD and there're am required to respect your vehicle
I told her shower beers are even better when you have someone in there with you and she said she's been looking for a new drinking buddy. It's a goooooo
He overslept for our prescheduled morning sex. The fact that my vagina isn't enough to get him out of bed was the last straw.
Can we just agree for a moment that semen in your sinuses is the fucking worst?
Whelp, I woke up on the front lawn this morning. I have got to stop wearing these underwear. Every time I do, I end up puking in someone's greenery.
Gave his drunk ass water, & he poured it on my shirt while saying "WET T-SHIRT CONTEST!" When reminded of it today he replied with, "at least you came in first place"
i said cake fell into my bra, you stood up and yelled "Im coming soldier", leaped acrossed the couch and started motorboating my boobs. i would have been cool with it if your mom didnt keep calling me the "lesbiainizer"
Randomize