Maybe I lied like you did about your herpes.
OMFG, I'm seriously about to get fairly unpolite with this guy.
Wow. I bet he's shakin' in his boots.
Just saw an Asian kid crash into the bike rack with his bike. I love sitting outside the engineering building.
I just heard a girl in all seriousness say, "I told him I'm not a stalker. I just really really want to talk to him."
Just because Aaron is a gender neutral name does not mean I am letting you name your baby after a drug dealer
I thought she was being abused so tried to go in at the sympathy angle, but the bruises were from pole dancing. I went in at all angles.
I was blowing him while he was singing Happy Birthday to his girlfriend on the phone. I win.
sorry to break it to you, but he's definitely fucking that other girl now...
I wish I still at least had the bruises on my ass to remember him by.
I just found out the guy that lied and blew me off got arrested, his mugshot is online. Life is good.
true... I just kept thinking "THAT IS A PENIS. OMG THAT IS A PENIS. DOES HE KNOW IM STARRING? STOP LOOKING. OMG THIS IS AWKWARD. PENISSSSS"
Got laid last night using the intro line of "rate your hurricane evacuation plan on a scale of 1-10"
Hahahaha. He sent me a dick snap in the lululemon stockroom. What is life. If this works out, this could benefit everyone....
I TAUGHT HER CAT TO SIT. CATS DON'T FUCKING SIT ON COMMAND. BUT THIS ONE DID!
It's basically my crowning achievement.
Okay everything with a penis is officially dead in my eyes
I need more 20 something year old penis in my life
Randomize
