I hope that the reason I've been psycho on him is that I'm pregnant and not just psycho.
Nothing kills the mood more than a jesus song.
Definitely saw about 20 people at my final that were never present before. It's like seeing who's gonna be serving me fries in 4 years.
i hooked up with a boy reading dear john, i have to get points for that somewhere
no he gets major points for having a girl hookup with him after reading dear john
i need you to babysit me first week back at school. havent had tequila, adderal, or sex w randoms in 3 months
i just saw the eighteen different ways i could die and only after that did i realize i'd made a poor decision
I don't know. I was also picked up by the doormen and held over the bar so I could do an upside down shot out of a bartenders tits.
Did you see the video of me eating a marshmellow on fire?
His mom already thought we were lesbians BODY SHOTS WERE JUST NOT AN OPTION SORRY
He realized that I was watching deadliest catch while we were jerkin off on FaceTime.
You're 21st was epic. I woke up at 6 a.m. on the floating beer pong table in the pool with a beer still in hand. Didn't even spill any
I just gave him road head. He came in the Taco Bell drive thru which seems pretty typical for my life.
After the first time we had sex he kept saying "I'm proud of you" over and over again
I think about him when I masturbate so I guess you could call it love
All you need for a happy life is Jameson and slippers
Randomize
