no, I didn't make it. Instead, i watched VH1 for... 13 hours? I use the question mark because I was using Flavor Flav's clocks to tell time after the first 3 hours.
flash back: i gave smirnoff to a group of children at walmart
ya i found him eventually. hes the only one who drinks guiness so I just had to follow the darkest green puke trail
he just voluntarily told me he was uncircumsized.. and that his favorite color was blue.
Joe decreed the livingroom and the hallway up to the burn mark his kingdom. I think this is the point of 'stage an intervention'
you ate the make a wish sign. Like actually chewed on it. It was our solution to going outside when the cops were there
theres too many punctuation errors in that text to turn me on.
He is so sweet! He thanks me for sending him dirty pix. I should keep him.
I got propositioned to get involved with an engaged couple. I told them I didn't think my married couple would like me to see other couples...
I encourage you to ignore feeling. Drinking more helps
I AM A SEXUAL NIGHTMARE
Remember when I convinced you to watch me eat my sandwich just so you could reuse my plate and save us money on our water bill? I'm so ecofriendly when I'm high
I think someone shaved off all their pubes in the handicap stall or a werewolf stopped by the office to take a crAzy dump!
I know she’s pissed I fucked her husband, but I didn’t know he was married until after I blew him at Legoland
I just caught your son trying to perform fellatio on himself. What do I do?
Randomize
