I considered driving home in his mom's bathrobe until i realized i'd have to stop to buy cigarettes
is the fantasy fufillment of sex in a hot tub worth the possible infection?
how soon is too soon to introduce handcuffs into a relationship?
only my mom would pack illegal paraphernalia in a care package..
Drunk lesbians having an argument about their realationship isn't as hot as I imagined.....
i figure i've seen his cum stains on the floor, i'm allowed to say these things.
I just dropped macaroni right down my cleavage. For the sake of our future, I'm really banking on this being a turn on for you.
I had not one but two drunk coworkers text me and hit on me tonight. I feel like I've finally been accepted into my dysfunctional workplace
I don't know. I just thought I'd put my drinks in my bag and go on an adventure. Like a drunk Bilbo Baggins.
I brought ur friend Scotty home... He started rubbing my crotch then fell down and passed out in front of the microwave
Yeah. I asked if there was a finger in my ass at some point or if I had a weird dream. So far he hasn't responded
are you really asking me this. do you KNOW how many times i masturbate in a day? yeah. wrong person to ask about romance.
I imagine you as a cat holding your burrito with two paws and cutely eating it
well i blew him then my wife blew him, so im guessing we'll be seeing him around, yeah
Remember that time we were together? Yeah, I don't miss that.
Randomize
