I was just curling my hair topless and I just burned my nipple. Ouch.
how drunk are you?
What does that even mean anymore?
Also, I once came to the conclusion after this one boy, that her pleasure condoms are a college boys version of flowers
I ended up giving him head, i think it was mostly a defensive move so that he wouldn't discover i was wearing those onesy spanx
If its allowed to Tornado at 830am then Im allowed to have a beer and a cigarette at 830am
I just tried to sell my homemade "lightning bolt stencil for pubes" on Etsy.
Just wrestled a cop. He won my shorts. I won my freedom. In fishnets and army boots. still headed to the party. would appreciate pants, but not necessary.
Here is a brilliant idea passed on from men who have that same regret. WEAR A FUCKING CONDOM ALWAYS.
I just used a thesaurus to write a sext...
Oh my god I found my bf's erotica
OH MY GOD HE WROTE THIS EROTICA.
OH MY GOD THIS IS GOOD EROTICA.
How do I figure out the name of this sleeping naked guy in my bed?
my mom just came into my room and handed me a news paper article about women on the verge of a drinking problem... i can already tell its not about to be sunday funday
eating a weed cupcake with nutella on top at work. i AM a star!
Literally just stood behind a guy in line at Walmart get his card declined when he attempted to purchase condoms. That's rock bottom.
I kinda realized titty fucking is purely for our enjoyment, they dont really get much out of it, except for a guy sitting on them and and a dick bouncing of their chin
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