We dont have to go to dinner or anything gay like that. I just wanna do it.
I absolutely love you.
I opened my browser to a doctor page titled "serious pain under left side of ribcage". Last night must have been healthy.
They only remember me when they're drunk...I'm like a suppressed memory.
we were hanging out in his room and he decided to play WoW.. so i took off all my clothes while he wasn't paying attention and laid on his bed and started playing with myself.
did he notice?
of course he didn't notice.. he was playing a fiesty level 1 fucker that wouldn't give up..
It's "your husband had his mouth on my vagina" awkward.
I feel like my uterus is decaying in my body
I'm beginning to think the only reason I get laid anymore is girls are fantasizing sleeping with my dad...
I'm mentally preparing myself to hang out with him by staring into the mirror saying "thou shalt not get naked" over and over.
Since the world is still here you can go ahead and disregard those pictures I sent
They had to stop us from skinny dipping in the reflection pool of the Mormon temple.
Should I tell this TSA agent his fly is down while he is trying to hit on this chick?
The stripper told Tom to sort his life out
I support your vibrator fueled lifestyle.
Campus scavenger hunt! and by scavenger hunt I mean all the pharmacies are sold out of Plan B.
When you realized the door was unlocked, you did the mission impossible yheme song and snuck into the bathroom. And continued it while you peed.
Randomize
