porn star on stage now. Get unkicked out.
are you serious?? is your clit as sensitive as your emotions
i wish
A homeless man in dtwn SF was blasting lil wayne and singing at the top of his lungs. I kinda wanted to give him my life savings
did you violate me with a mr sketch marker when i passed out? i just peed and wiped purple and it smelled like grape. i need to get to the bottom of this...
I knew you were drunk when you poured scotch on a croissant and ate it.
If you're still awake, how rude would it be if I masturbated in her new apartment on moving day? If you're asleep, then ask me how it was.
The 30 seconds of sex was almost worth it...I mean he did smoke me out and watched the princess and the frog with me
We should bet how many people are going to get alcohol poisoning next weekend and whoever wins gets a free Starbucks.
Tell me you didn't really piss in the hookah.
I believe nudity is frowned upon at that establishment
You're invited to our X-games themed party. We have an ice luge and every time someone eats shit we drink. It's gonna be great.
Not great. "Leave the toilet seat down, it gives me somewhere to rest my face."
But idk if I cried about life then banged him or banged him and then cried. Chicken or the egg?
We drank vodka and koolaid through a traffic cone. It got rowdy.
Did April legit get married in a parking lot?
Randomize
