Dude, she DOES look like she'd give good head. No bottom jaw, I checked.
It's a beautiful day for a hangover
it was like eating out sand paper
you tried to clear everyones facebook status so that yours would be the only one on everyones home page
Alone. In an inflatable pool. Drinking vodka and raspberry lemonade. I don't need approval as much as I need to know you love me still.
Walked by a shop giving away free donuts this morning. Best walk of shame ever
I want to do something romantic. Like gargle champagne before I put your dick in my mouth.
My mom just told me my dad shaves his pubes while drunk and I don't know how to feel anymore.
Didn't want to waste the cheese dust from the white cheddar popcorn, so I gave him a handjob, followed by the most delicious blowjob ever. Win-win.
I love this text stream: discussing the development of a business model centered around cooking acid to bankroll a yacht trip in Croatia
for some reason leaving your socks onmakes it less meaningful.
THE STRIPPER HAD A GUN JOHN!
Hopefully he gets to dig deep into my body, before he digs deep into my past ..
Her tits are so fantastic they gave him a panic attack.
I got up and left his place at 3am because I remembered I had a burrito in my car.
Randomize