make any headway on the foot/dick situation?
If it makes you feel better, I doubt anything could survive in your uterus.
I am drunk at a castle and it isn't even 3. Europe is amazing.
He waited til after we had sex to tell me he had herpes... Ugh I hate being drunk
I'm going to see if it catches on fire again, then I'll make the decision.
Its official. I've reentered slutty territory. I was a condom away from having sex in a childs playhouse at a park. Oh and I lost my car keys.
We had to leave after he was in the middle of the street yelling "Balls of Steeeeeeeeel!!"
FridayRule: If it takes you longer than 5 minutes to find a parking spot, you don't have class today
The rest of the concert I just stared at the lights and didn't really listen to the music cuz I was trying to make sure my brain still worked cuz my face was numb and I couldn't move... Yeah I'm not a weed brownie person
I was thinking that maybe I should not apply to Wells Fargo because they def have me on candid camera taking a drunken nap at 3am in their lobby.
This is not a costume party, I'm just wearing fairy wings.
Of course you are.
All of the hungover. I've changed not showered but can't quite make it to the booze.
WE'RE IN THE RED ZONE PLAY THRU THE PAIN
I'm trying to get WebMD to diagnose me with a hangover
Business idea: assless chaps for toddlers. I'm high.
These morning walks of shame have became my morning jogs
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