I just watched the Dark knight, Maggie Gylennhaal looks like Katie Holmes after a stroke
They're donating plasma together for extra money. Couple of the fucking century.
we have to get out to the bar earlier. all of the guys are already committed to the girls they're going home with.
hell no. last time, i couldn't pee straight for a week.
She insisted on fucking on the futon mattress on the floor, answered the phone call from her boyfriend who was on his way to pick her up, and then had the audacity to ask if I was clean
drunk enough to drink jager bombs out of a bowl on the kitchen floor.
My prof gave me extra credit for drawing a ninja on my paper and writing "ninja will up my grade"
I'm super stoned watching the vatican smoke cam. Come over.
Finals drinking + forgeting you had to take your ambien because you work at 6am mid paper= drunk logic which then entails going on a "detox" run. Puking your guts put in the field house bushes while some random guy says to you "its okay. We're marching on."
I don't really want to talk about it, but if anyone finds my unicorn mask with my bra in it, I would really like that back.
I asked him if we were going to get arrested for doing it in the bar parking lot. "Absolutly not" said the guy getting the blow job...
I just don't understand why your parents aren't supporting your dreams of being a medieval weapon smith.
I need to leave my mind and my stupid vagina are having fight over who's right
Crop dusting thru forever 21
Are you coming over for scrambled eggs and hand jobs?
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