He ate me out. It was like watching him trying to win a pie eating contest
one should ask oneself what kind of lifestyle one is leading when one finds a handprint of semen on their pillow the next day.
I'm pretty sure you're not supposed to hit on someone with another guy's semen in your hair. not even at ihop.
Nope, just sitting on the couch, eating an advent calendar, being depressed about the herps.
Did we fight the bathroom girl ? She just wanted to give us lotion and condoms.
i just snorted adderall with my patient's rolled up EKG strip from our last clinical. nursing school has ruined me. thought you would appreciate this.
So I just did the math and everything in this room except the computer and my clothes has been in my vagina
I had a dream last night where I used the marginal product rule to figure out how much more hangover I got per sip of four loko, econ is taking over my life...
I am just saying if Clark Kent walks into your life, you fuck him
unless you have a dick and you were thinking of chopping that off
Gotcha. How bad is it?
Well to compare it to something I would say it what's that walls would like inside the primate exhibit at the zoo after a group of monkeys finished throwing feces at each other all afternoon
This tequila is so bad I might cry. I won't Throw up but I might cry
We put you in the box and you started to cry, that's how high you were.
At least get laid and waffle fries out of it you whipped basterd
Stupid Covid-19
The universal cock block of this decade
Randomize