: south campus drug res life name erik. Love, tran
Is it weird i consider You Sexy Thing our song?
While I was fucking her, they came in and served us both weed from a hookah. best. friends. ever.
Your ass just called me, someone was yelling "awful waffle" and also, " I don't know who's hands are who's anymore"
I think it's safe to say taking shots on the way to the emergency room was rock bottom. We're going to need to think of ways to top that between now and next new years eve...
I haven't been sober in 4 days.
Then be sober
No.
sex, shower, sex, ice cream sandwiches?
I feel like you're gonna be reading this at 6 AM in a ditch or under a bridge, but please remember...I offered to drive you home. And you said no.
The sad thing is that it's 6:45 and you're not far off.
she texted me 'with freud,' which i thought was drunk for 'i'm with my friend.' but nope, she was actually on a statue of the psychologist sigmund freud.
I was gonna respond but i couldnt figure out a way to rearrange 'fuck his brains out' to sound grammatically correct
Come eat Chinese buffet and watch us trip on acid. It'll be fun.
I was just giving a mobile app demo to a client, on my iPhone, when a reminder alert appeared across the page blinking "12pm: go home and give John head". You're an asshole
Hahaha oops.
Answered a bio test question bc of watching phineas and ferb. Remind me to always drink when studying.
Lol I'm just saying its too early for your penis, I can accept it but at a more decent hour
Guess it's not a good idea to try lighting a cigarette with my stove drunk, I burnt off half my bangs.
Randomize
