If you borrow your friends real doll, should you wear a condom?
question. what would be the least awkward way to ask your one night stand if he came inside of you because you would really prefer not to have his illegitimate lovechild. hypothetically.
i just used shampoo as lube. why? because i'm worth it.
Your brother just informed me that half a mouthful is a unit of measurement. I love talking to members of your family.
He screamed "Oh boy! Oh boy!" during climax.
When it gets to the point that I'm more comfortable being naked at his house than my own, it's time to readdress the fuckbuddyship.
I have the Everlasting Gobstopper of boners right now. It's kinda like a gift from god, but I don't want to spend anymore time with this girl than I have to.
we left the music on while we were fucking. some kanye west song started playing and he started to cry
He's just sitting there staring at my sisters teddy bear hoping it will come to life.
I learn from experience and I experienced what it would be like to completely lose my mind and then wake up with a stab wound.
I know it must have been a hard break up. Are you okay?
Oh yeah, I'm fine dude. My vaginas heart is broken though. I feel bad for her, you should give her a call sometime.
Glad to know I rate above a cabbage on the parenting scale.
And we had three hours of crazy sex then his roommate ate pizza off me while I was sleeping.
I need five more minutes of sobbing.. AND THEN I will get back to studying
My booty call is in the theater watching Deadpool right now. Never though comics would work against me.
Randomize
