All these guys look like the American Apparel version of Jesus...
just landed in detroit. Currently holding a bag of my own vomit. neighbor told me it was the most graceful vom she has ever seen. Kicking off bar exam week in style.
is 69 when you're sideways or up & down? I was on my back & confused.
A slipped finger up the butt isn't the end of the world
i woke up with a wedding ring drawn on my finger...if this was vegas id be worried
apparently it isn't appropriate to tell a coworker who is eating celery because it's "negative calories" that a blowjob is too
I'm gonna drop in for a zip later man. It made me wanna eat my girls shampoo. Good shit
Half of my brain feels like I donated it to science and they basically just poured jack Daniels on it and put out cigarettes into it before returning it to my skull
He tried to stop traffic by waving his half eaten pizza at cars.... And we were stupid enough to cross .....??!!!
Not much, just taking another sorting hat quiz while waiting for this porno to finish buffering
I wouldn't know what to do. You never really mentally prepare for a cactus getting thrown at your face.
your girlfriend showed us your homemade porn last night.
I just accidentally deep throated a popsicle in front of my parents
His wife just cheated on him for the third time. I'm his first extra-marital fling, that makes it ok, right? You know to keep karma balanced in the universe
Your logic is flawless...
We all love a big dick, but you’re going to develop a reputation if you keep asking every guy at the bar ‘how big your dick’
That’s all I’m saying
Randomize
