okay, prove you're not drunk to me. write 5 true sentences about me with correct grammar.
I am sober. Because I don't drunk. It is bad. People die. I like Domenico because o he bag women what up?
Clothes are such an inconvenience.
we made out inside of a kiddie slide for about 20 mins. it was the sexiest, most suffocating experience I've ever had
had to bail. she had her cat tattooed on her
You came out of the bathroom, said "I'M DRUNK BUT I REMEMBERED TO WASH MY HANDS!" and then insisted that she smell them.
If you're still on campus there's a jack and coke in the bathroom of fondren science Bldg. Too strong to bring to class.
want to meet me after class and possibly get arrested for indecent exposure?
yeah we were the ones eating jello shots out of the back of a jeep in the bar parking lot
I think a van full of parolees just blew me kisses. Thoughts?
Today was my cousin's Kindergarten graduation. I happen to also think of it as a MILF convention.
I got his number because he was "impressed with how much I could handle"...I was chasing shots with Olive Garden breadsticks...
That's so awful of me. Instead of comforting her I masturbated in front of my ex-boyfriend.
That awkward moment when you realize that last night you walked from in n out to petco, bought a mouse for $3, named it mogar, taught it how to skateboard on a techdeck, made it a home out of a trash can, fed it fruity pebbles and cheese, and then forgot where you left it.
Yeah I'm just gonna stay here and spread my horniness to the world.
Today will be the day I throw up in my backpack in the middle of class
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