I think about you every night.
I'm sorry.
She's trying to master eating with her feet. She said it was be she "always has to be prepared."
Care to explain why there is sushi in the soap dish in the bathroom
Driving by his house every hour is not stalking, it's a reconnaissance mission... How else can I confront him
Just got that "I know what's going on with your vagina" look from that CVS cashier.
You bought MORE?!
For the record, just because I'm a mess doesn't mean I don't know what I'm talking about when I give you advice. I'm way better at other people's lives.
How do I tell your little brother I lost my virginity wearing nothing but his socks?
Formal letter or email.
Captain and coke. And it's not drinking alone cuz i have a dog
By god, his vagina is better looking than mine.
I am harder than a fucking diamond and Michael Bolton is playing. Your move.
like don't tell me my baby smooth vag offended you
Well, I told him that it's not all about him. Then I gave him the best blow-job in the history of blow-jobs.
he told me his feelings for me AFTER sex, so that means he meant it right?
home. only unpacked the necessities...contact case and beer.
The salt made it so good this margarita is touching my soul. I swear I'm not high BUT I want elote in a cup with the insides of a shrimp taco. I think that would make my life complete.
Randomize
