He looks like a mix between a retired piano teacher and a cat that just swallowed a sock.
You paid the taxi driver with a comb last night.
drunk. just smoked a spliff with a 19yr old hungarian bike taxi driver and bonded over the difficulties of getting weed in a different country. idk y shit like this isnt in the study abroad info packets
I'm dealing with this like an adult, cupcakes and beer.
It's Been clinically proven that people who have sex 6 or more times per week are happier than those who don't. Just and FYI. For your mental health. From a soon so be psychologist. Who is drunk.
I'll be home next weekend. Its mothers day. Let's party just enough so we are frightened it might be our first
Was I at least a good cuddler? Like at least honorable mention?
i found waldo and immediately set him to work eating me out. please have more out of season costume parties.
You have talents. You got me laid two weekends in a row in two different cities.
I just love that a strip club has taco Tuesday.
If he refers to me as slump buster one more fucking time.
On another note I never thought having a drug addicted stalker would prove useful
Of all of my friend's husbands, I like when yours hits on me best
Awe that means so much to us
Left Las Vegas at 2:30 am, woke up at 11 AM at a Barstow gas station with the Valet from Ceaser' palace snoring in the backseat and no memory of how we got there. I felt like Raoul Fucjing Duke right then and there.
The lady in the stall next to me just screamed "why are you so hairy!?" and "why can't you get any!?" to her vagina. WTF
Randomize
