It was kinda weird being the boss
Did you feel like Tony Danza?
I'm at a work party and I don't know how to drink socially. You know, like slow?
We almost didn't get a second pitcher, but now we're getting a sixth.
He just left me a message saying he left the rest of the weed for me. Did i just get paid for sex? And if yes did i just get paid in drugs?
What's the policy for hitting on a girl at a funeral? She seems more bored than sad.
She started howling at the moon. That was pretty much the deal breaker.
I know it's early but when you wake up can you please validate my life and tell me I'm not just a drunk idiot.
I'll pay you to write the paper but not for sex. You should only get paid for something you work hard at.
Was it fun? The night started with home made Jager and ended in him falling out of a tree with a pocket full of house numbers...you tell me.
Yeah even if I got stabbed it would be worth it
the reputation of my dick game is on the line. You're killing the team, here, G
She didn't get a tit job, she's just wearing the right size bra for once
Do we have to do this party tonight? I'm worried my bed will miss me...
some guy had a sword and everyones crying..it turned bad..fast.
just woke up to an abnormally swollen ankle (broken, perhaps?) and a shirtless man with the most beautiful abs I've ever seen sleeping on my floor.
is your ankle ok??
WHY IS HE ON THE FLOOR. SINCE WHEN DOES BLACKOUT ME ALSO COCKBLOCK ME
Randomize