You just kept saying over and over "Tell me I won't do it." Someone finally told you you won't. You did. Welcome to herpes.
Today was the day I stopped kidding myself and started buying the handle of vodka.
Sorry for calling you a whore in front of your mom. World cup brings the worst out of me.
You should've come out last night, I need someone to explain why the bartender tried to strangle me...
If you're going to outback I'll have to decline, I've slept with a large enough portion of their staff already.
There's a certain level of slut that i can handle.... I think she just broke that scale
yeah they are definitely having sex in that car. joe just yelled through the window telling them to do the "titanic hand print thing"
Their was just 7 people standing outside eating a costco chicken, definitley at the right party
AND OMG I HOPE YOU ARE GREAT WITH CHILD. COOK THAT BUN!
Meant to have fun, ended up giving speech about consent to guy at bar. Feminist side feels happy. Orgasms side feels confused and betrayed.
I was doing karaoke to "baby got back" and apologizing for being white at the same time.
yeah well, its not like my astrogynecology class is teaching me what i need to know
im almost 90% sure there is no such thing as astrogynecology.
I just gave him road head. He came in the Taco Bell drive thru which seems pretty typical for my life.
Already doing pt exercises by picking my margarita up off the night stand. Fuck yeah.
They think I fractured my spine while doing your cousin on concrete.
Randomize
