sometimes i really wish you were a nugget.
after taking her first shot and having her first random hook up she finally feels like she is ready for college
she has no idea
I really should sober up and deal with this hangover
It seems to be one of those life decisions I'm perfectly content never making though
It didn't get weird until she took off her underwear, looked down, and said "fill her up!"
I have got to stop getting laid on my lunch breaks. I AM SO HUNGRY RIGHT NOW.
all my mom knows is what I put on facebook. So... I mean... She knows we drink a lot.
He came over drunk in a speedo i told him he has my vote he said who are you voting for when i said obama he took off running and shouting i was worthless like an empty beer can
I dont think I should be allowed to pick my own boyfriends anymore
No dude, he just dipped his cigarette info ranch dressing and lit it. He's said he normally doesn't do that but it's Memorial Day.
I'm going to three dry weddings this month. I'm flashing three dry weddings this month
I'm 2 seconds away from smashing the bottle and drinking it off the counter with a straw.
I really don't think my body can handle another night of drinking
Lol you talk like you have a choice
I am worried that I am gonna die before the weekend is over
THERE'S MORE TO LIFE THAN JUST MISSIONARY
I may just have to resign myself to life in flats. He's a sexy little chipmunk that worships me.
I'm fucked-out. That state of being high between fucked up and passed out.
Randomize
