covered in glitter, my cheek hurts, and theres a handprint on my face. Would i do it again. Absolutly
its like they have never seen someone walk through campus with a plunger
I know I hit you with my car but people express love in different ways. Everyone is different.
Apparently one comment in my womens studies class cockblocks yourself for an entire semester.
we're about an hour out, how's the weather?
cloudy with a chance of strippers and cocaine, you're favorite. welcome home.
Hey do you have a way to post bail? If not we can hook you up. If a police officer is reading this please ask him and respond in a timely fashion. I am concerned for my imprisoned friend
so you told her it was a 'nam scar? i mean, how old does she think you are.
don't worry i just saved a song to my personal usb drive to give to the dj at the bar. he's playing old school jlo whether he likes it or not.
Do you think he feels stupid trying to bang girls with his small penis? I'd be embarrassed.
"The cab driver felt bad for us so he stopped to buy us chocolates. That counts as a valentine!"
if i bang your brother are we still cool?
Easter was a success. We had an egg hunt and hid weed and conforms inside them. Cooked a ham, made some jello, got wasted. THIS is adulthood?!
Whatever you have to do, STALL THEM. Your toothbrush is in the kitchen, my pants are on the balcony, and I don't have eyebrows.
I just need to find someone whose kink is financial submission.
Decided to stay in tonight. Completely sober. Just got two drunken booty calls within 5 minutes of each other. This is my life.
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