Where are you?
In a non slutty way
As gay men are we obligated to learn the Single Ladies dance.
He's a fan of Alicia Keys on Facebook. It doesn't NEED to say 'interested in men'.
so i had sex last night with my 12th partner, but hes number 1 for my first time using a condom. i think im finally learning.
Does anyone know why "math wizard" is written on my arm?
I think it's safe to say taking shots on the way to the emergency room was rock bottom. We're going to need to think of ways to top that between now and next new years eve...
Holy shit, Uber is testing a service to summon an ice cream truck.
Bring me the penis of the founder so I may endlessly fellate him. Or cunnalinge. I don't discriminate.
You kept yelling in my face " YOU'RE GONNA HAVE TO SUCK A DICK TONIGHT!"
A BJ like that needs to be recommended.
No, the moral of my Oxford interview was "Never snort caffeine pills".
You attract beautiful men with jobs. I attract ONE WITH A SOUL PATCH.
it was a sexy soul patch.
He is a sex God. It lasted more than an hour, and I don't remember how many times I came. I lost count at 57.
I'm not totally useless... You can use me as an example of what not to do
I haven't lost it. I know I'm not a prophet. It was a joke.
After the edible you claimed you were talking to my cat. We're in our 30s now, what was once cute is now a liability.
Got so drunk I broke my sink in half. Not. Lying.
Randomize
