What do they do with the elephants that die at the zoo
Cremation, why do you ask?
I think we have a bit of a problem
I got a lap dance until she said they wipe of the poles between each dance to clear the "std slime", i couldnt even masterbate at home it was a horrible military monday
you wrote "5 million dollars" in the tip line for the pizza delivery man and insisted that he deserves it
went to the gyno and found out that i have a birthmark on my clit. its like god gave guys a little help when it comes to getting me off.
now were playing what girl doesnt belong in the picture of girls in bikinis.
She can't really be mad at me. I made you two sisters... Dick sisters.
Yeah got a self inflicted broken nose.
After your flask fell out of your leg brace and you told your RA that it was juice, you tried to unlock your dorm room but your key was attached to your bra so he ended up seeing your boobs
ummm im also counting the $14 dollars I gave the old guy to pay for the cab I called for him to take to the hospital last night as part of ur present.
You go to bars with sophisticated older men, I steal lawn ornaments. Priorities
there is vomit in the pocket of my dress coat. i remember thinking "this is a weird place to puke" at some point in the evening, but i dont understand how i did this.
I bought emergency contraception until I / we decide how to handle that. And target gave me a gift receipt for it. Awkward.
I felt like I should've driven him home but I was holding in a fart and just needed him to leave
Is it immoral to trade sex for the use of his laundry room?
I wanna riverboat gamble on your vaginal waters. Just sayin
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